Gu Yue Tien, Chulan Square: iPhone Death & My Gastro-therapy

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I’m just gonna come right out and say it, “My iPhone 3Gs drowned and died on me.”
It’s a relief being able to say that out loud now. In a ludicrous and daft moment over the weekend, I decided to take my phone to the toilet with me. As I was unzipping my pants, the phone slipped right off my fingers and landed inside the stool throne in a matter of a second. I could only utter an “Oh F**k!” before I quickly reached my hands inside and fished it out. I profusely pat it with a towel and shake off all the excess water. Thinking that wouldn’t help one bit, I graduated to a hair dryer. Only to find out through a few online articles that it was one of the dumbest thing I could have done. Arghh… I Googled more and followed some recommendations to just bury the poor soaked up phone into a bag of uncooked rice. Being gullible and desperate at that point, I believed everything I read. After all it made sense, rice does absorb moisture!
An hour later I realised it was a stupid idea, I then learned to open up the iPhone through a youtube tutorial and started to wipe the insides dry as well. But, it was too late. Nothing I do could save the thing now. So, feeling paralyzed and agog, I locked myself within the walls of my room and drew the curtains shut. I act this way when something disastrous happens to me. I just lie in bed, curled up in fetus position and wallow in my helplessness. I exaggerate of course, but you get the idea. Hours of just doing nothing, toggling between taking naps and staring blankly at the screen of my MacBook for hours. Well, it’s not doing nothing per se. I’m just trying to wrap my head around whole situation and find my silver lining. There must be one, right? I know I don’t sound like the kind that would get all emotional over something like this, but I surprised myself sometimes too.
And when I finally emerged from all that haze after a 24-hours lock down, mind you that’s probably longer than Paris Hilton’s recent cocaine lock up stint, I’d then began to seek solace in food. Everyone has their own way to cope –  some shop, some dance, some write while others paint. I just need a good Gastro-therapy. It’s a temporary measure to numb my feelings while I continue to mourn the loss of a good ‘companion’. I even named it mPhone (as in MonkeyPhone). Yea, I’m such a loser. I know. It’s sad. 
So, I enlisted the company of the Makan-Fairy-Godmother and Sista Banana. Their lively company was just what my fragile heart and growling tummy needed as we made our way to Gu Yue Tien (???) along Chulan Square.
A brilliantly crafted screen, made from over a hundred of Chinese abacus, greeted us as we ascended to the top the restaurant’s spiral stairway. The screen, strategically placed behind an antique table piled with menus disguised as ancient books, clearly sets the expectation for the sort of meal that was to follow. Very much like its decor scheme, dishes served here are contemporary yet carefully-peppered with paraphernalia like fine China vases, lanterns and ornamented windows to remind us that we are still dining in a Chinese restaurant. I have a lot of respect for establishments which honour its traditions as much as it believes in innovation.

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However, its elegant decor only played second fiddle to its undeniably excellent cuisine created by its chef and restaurant owner, Frankie Woo – a man who’s many accolades and reputation precedes him. If you’re up for it, let the chef create a degustation menu –  like what we did. Half the fun was anticipating what the next dish would be. My weary heart was finally pounding with excitement once again.
Our appetite were whet right from the beginning with the Momo Duck Roll, consisting of a slice of nicely smoked duck, a piece of semi-ripe mango, crispy beancurd skin, sweetish pickled cucumber, crunchy spring onions and all nicely held together with a sliver of cucumber. The way to eat this was to roll the ingredients all up with the piece of crepe sitting underneath, which was spread with a smokey sauce and laced with just the faintest hint of wasabi. The result was an infusion of salty, sweet and smokey flavours with a zingy aftertaste.
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The Pan-fried Foie Gras and Stuffed Scallop in Orange and Honey Sauce was a dish with the most unusual gathering of ingredients I would never have thought complimented each other. It took this brave and unconventional chef to show us how by sprinkling unsuspecting pieces of nangka (jackfruit) and strawberry on top this elaborated dish was just a way to make it taste lighter. Go figure!
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The warm and peppery Pig’s Tripe Soup was terribly comforting. We added a little pinch of chopped coriander to layer the overall taste with a hint of freshness to the soup.
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The Salt Baked Iberico Pork Ribs were tender and insanely tasty to the bone. It was mind-boggling trying to figure out how the chef managed to prepare this simple yet flavourful dish in such a short span of time. Perhaps, we would qualify to run the kitchen if we did actually figure it out. We just stuck to what we know best – eating!
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A normal and unassuming plate of Fried Egg Noodles with X.O Sauce landed on our table and we were told it was the last savoury dish of the evening. We didn’t really thought much of it and was glad that the portion was small. The handmade noodle looked more like regular kway teow (flat rice noodles) than wanton noodles, left us amazed at its texture. Soft, brittle yet it held a good mouth-feel. Eating the noodles together with cut pickled green chili was the icing on the cake. 
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Our evening ended with the Chilled Avacado & Mango Cream in Tai Chi Style, 1-part refreshingly sour and 1-part delightfully sweet.
I’m glad I decided to go out that evening. Every dish was sublime and served in just the right portion. Enough to taste without over indulging. The meal left us pleasantly stuffed and I went home feeling happy. I only have the Makan-Fairy-Godmother to thank for such a wonderful experience. 
***
Post-Script:
Life in the last few days weren’t the same without my iPhone. I now whip out my low-tech dinosaur of a phone and am reminded that it can’t do any fancy tricks. Well, I keep telling myself that life must go on and it is no use kicking myself over it. It was fun while it lasted. I’ll continue to miss it… at least until I can get my hands on the new iPhone 4. Time to really start saving up!
By the way, if you’re wondering how much the meal cost, it’s approximately RM100/person.
***

Gu Yue Tien
Lot 5A, Chulan Square
Jalan Raja Chulan
50200 Kuala Lumpur
Tel: +603-2148 0808

Business Hours:
Mon til Sat: Lunch 11.30 – 2.30pm and Dinner 6.30pm – 10.30pm;
Sun & Public Holidays Lunch 10am – 2.30pm and Dinner 6.30pm – 10.30pm.
Note: Background Red & Gold pattern is designed by farflungcraft.com
23 Responses to Gu Yue Tien, Chulan Square: iPhone Death & My Gastro-therapy
  1. boo_licious
    September 1, 2010 | 12:35 am

    Sorry to hear abt yr Iphone. Hope it can be repaired. Yes, food at Gu Yu Tien is slurp-licious. There's never a bad moment with Frankie's creations.

  2. Sean
    September 1, 2010 | 12:40 am

    Haven't heard that Expose song in ages! It's one of my favorites … and it helped me get through some tough times when I was 17!
    Yeah, hopefully it'll just be a couple more months before u get that new phone! Y'know, if each of your readers sends one ringgit to your bank account or something, u could raise the funds for a new phone in no time! A small price to pay in exchange for all the entertainment derived from your comics :D

  3. UnkaLeong
    September 1, 2010 | 12:59 am

    Aiyo…*hugs* But what an excellent way to get over the loss, with a meal at Gu Yu Tien ;)

    I second Sean's suggestion. Who should I make the RM1 check out to?

  4. Life for Beginners
    September 1, 2010 | 1:05 am

    Nothing like a Makan-Fairy-Godmother to make a calamity like that go away (a bit, anyway).

    Here's to your next iPhone! :)

  5. qwazymonkey
    September 1, 2010 | 1:12 am

    Boo: Maxis says it can be repaired with a RM2,400 payment. In other words, get a new one! I could buy an iPhone 4 for much less!

    Sean: I love it too. Spoke to me when I was much younger too. I have all but 10 readers. That's a long stretch. LOL, but sweet of you think of it.

    Unka: Just thinking, maybe collecting from facebook friends would be a better idea. But no comics there.

    LFB: Agree…so long I don't get turned into a pumpkin. ;P

  6. J
    September 1, 2010 | 1:30 am

    Wah lau wei.
    2400 to fix it. Ask them to take it n stuff it… ERm. Anyway,… I guess you just have to get a new Iphone. :(

  7. CUMI & CIKI
    September 1, 2010 | 2:52 am

    larvely!! u make me wanna blog .. NOW LOL :P

    sabar.. sabar..

    iCan iLike iSay iWant iEat ! Mwuahaaha

    (don't worry, we get u new fone okay..)

  8. babe_kl
    September 1, 2010 | 4:01 am

    sorry to hear this, I guess must be a sign to ask you to get the 4G version :p

  9. PureGlutton
    September 1, 2010 | 4:20 am

    Condolences on the demise of yr iPhone – but good reason for u to get a new one!
    Food looked really scrumptious!

  10. Lyrical Lemongrass
    September 1, 2010 | 4:37 am

    Glad you found solace in the company of such lovely people and delicious looking food, bff.

  11. gfad
    September 1, 2010 | 7:27 am

    Awww.. poor boy. Reading the yummy comic strip with sad songs was like one of those girls-night-in-with-loads-of-chocolate-and-ice-cream-after-breakup-with-boyfren. All those sobbing amidst slurping ice cream, gulping cake and grabbing tissues to dap the tears.

    I will gladly contribute to your new phone fund (I missed out on the camera fund, remember?).

  12. J2Kfm
    September 1, 2010 | 8:52 am

    Oh dear. But I almost always brought my phone along to the loo! Hehe, now I know better.

    Cheer up, after all … iPhone 3Gs will be another dinosaur once the 4G arrives on our shore.

    I hope. :)

    Though that dinner sounded sooooo good, I am willing to believe those food shows on TV for once!

  13. Adelene
    September 1, 2010 | 3:19 pm

    Kesian….I also like to bring my iPhone to the jamban. It's good company.

  14. qwazymonkey
    September 1, 2010 | 3:20 pm

    J: Yeah lah. I guess its just their sarcastic way of telling me to just get a new one.

    C&C: Hehehe, well I was inspired too

    Babe_KL: Yeah. just counting the days til that happens

    Pureglutton: Food was scrumptious!

    LL: Food and friends are the best combination in the world. Who needs cool phones or padpads eh?

    GFAD: Reminds me of the opening scene in Bridget Jones Diary. "All by myselllllffff".

    J2Kfm: That dinner was awesome!!

  15. wingedman
    September 1, 2010 | 3:48 pm

    You know, I read the whole piece but I have only one nagging question…what DID you do with the bag of rice that has absorbed all that eau de toilette?!

  16. kampungboycitygal
    September 2, 2010 | 4:04 am

    i love how u relate the whole story – hilarious! but seriously, my sympathy to you, i would have do the same if i were in ur shoes. iphone 4 is the way to go :D

  17. fatboybakes
    September 2, 2010 | 4:08 am

    wow, the food looks amazing… quite okay hor, for RM100 per head, considering got foie gras all.

    [observing a minute's silence over your dead phone]…be strong monkey boy, your phone has gone to a better place, where apples roam free…

  18. Paranoid Android
    September 2, 2010 | 5:21 am

    What a deliciously funny and clever post! love it to bits. You are a very clever and talented monkey. Who was the model sitting on the throne? lol.

  19. Chaokar
    September 2, 2010 | 9:00 am

    i suppose maxis is also proposing for a phone replacement charges instead of repairing it.

    i want peppery pig's tripe soup !

  20. ClumSy Chic
    September 3, 2010 | 4:47 pm

    Very funny^^ Nice one~~ So it's ur blog that I've been stalking for quite a while….

  21. thenomadGourmand
    September 5, 2010 | 8:16 am

    ah..mz say tis is one of the few chinese restaurants tht i listed to try..atr bein the Sime Darby one.
    Food is alws creative yet delicious..

    Eiks..mz b careful w my Nexus One di..I alws read tweets frm the throne too!

  22. qwazymonkey
    September 5, 2010 | 3:58 pm

    wingedman: I made the best Claypot Chicken Rice with em…with extra salted fish *sniggers*

    kbcg: Waiting for the launch! :)

    FBB: Where the apples roam free? Hahahah! Ur crack me up lah Ahpa!

    PA: Can't you tell that those are monkey legs?

    Chaokar: Yeah, they told me it can be replace for RM2400! Go figure. No soup for you!

    Clumsy Chic: "Hi!"

    TNG: Yeah, better leave your phone away from the toilet. It's such a bad habit doncha think?

  23. qwazymonkey
    September 5, 2010 | 3:59 pm

    Ads: Now got no company in there d.